I Found My Happy Place

Like most students, this semester is fully online for me. And it kind of sucks. I will admit, it’s nice having class in my pajamas when I don’t want to wake up early to get ready. It’s nice to have the ability to do classwork outside in the grass when I can’t stand being inside anymore. And nothing can beat doing schoolwork with a cat in your lap. But being home also has its downsides. And I’m over it. All I do anymore is get online for class, work on schoolwork every second of the day, try and remember to eat, go to bed, and start again. I haven’t seen my friends in a while. I haven’t had a good, meaningful conversation that didn’t mention school in a while. And worst of all, I haven’t felt pure joy in a while. I’m not thriving, to say the least. (But if we’re being honest, who is right now?) Everything feels absolutely meaningless and that drives me crazy because nothing in life should be meaningless.

So when the feelings of being stuck start to roll in, I pack up and leave for the beach. Even if that means I drive anywhere from 3 to 8 hours to get to one.

There’s just something about being around the ocean. It’s the wind blowing through your air, salt air filling up your lungs, the sun gently warming you. It’s the feeling of walking on the beach, sand squishing between your toes, and sticking to your skin going along for the ride. It’s the way finding seashells and sea glass makes you feel like a kid again and how the sun makes you tired enough for a full night of sleep after a long day. Nothing beats it. And no matter how stressful or overwhelming life is, the ocean makes things feel okay, even if just for a simple, small moment. Simply being around the beach has this effect on me. It’s a new environment, a new place to explore, and a place that forces me to take a break and breathe.

I’m currently writing this while sitting on the front porch of the rental house, staring at the marsh across the street. Last night I stayed up till 2:45 in the morning finishing homework, then proceeded to have a total breakdown over school. It was the second break down this week. This semester is defeating me. But all of that doesn’t matter right now. Because currently there is just the right amount of ocean breeze blowing and the weather is perfect. There are butterflies dancing around flower bushes and egrets looking for lunch in the marsh. And in a few minutes, I’m going to walk to the beach, find the perfect spot of sand and read in the warmth of the sun till I fall asleep. Tomorrow morning we are going to wake up early and walk on the beach as the sun rises with hot coffee in our hands. And the day after that, I’m going to wade through waist-deep water in search of the most perfect seashells and you can bet I’ll act like I’m five when I find them.

Life isn’t perfect, but this feels like the closest I’m going to get.

If you ever feel stuck in life, make a change. (You’re never truly stuck). Take it from me and find your happy place before the struggles of life get too overwhelming to handle. Find a spot in this world to call your own and notice how it makes you feel. And whenever life feels like you can’t handle it, go to that place, remember to breathe, and notice all the good moments around you.